May 6, 2025 (May 4 and 5 skipped)

I was aware before I started this that a consistent post a day was unrealistic – it was a target not a goal.

Just as well – because in the past I have made that error. Set a goal that I knew was ambitious – that had no margin for error – and stumble early on and walk away- again – a failure.

I have set myself up to fail this way too many times to mention because I was taught that you are supposed to be ambitious. To encourage yourself to try harder, to put in more effort.

What no one seemed to realise – myself included – was that I was already at maximum effort just trying to keep up and trying to do things the way others did. That what was easy for them was genuinely difficult for me.

So now, I have learned to give myself grace, to stumble, to adjust course, keeping myself – as much as possible – in the same direction – while recognising that my journey (and journey times) may keep altering.

This time the stumble was down to not adjusting for my battery needs. I was exceptionally proud of myself for planning ahead – knowing I was doing something on Saturday and scheduling a post ahead of time for that day.

Unfortunately – because that day was the focus – my executive function didn’t look past that event. It didn’t say –

‘Wow – that looks like a battery intensive day – great fun – but it’s going to nuke your battery. We had better schedule posts for the following two days too – because you will be recovering and too exhausted to function.’

Nope.

It just went ‘Yay, we looked past today at the BIG THING up ahead and planned what to do. Great job everyone!!!’

So, in honour of my still recovering and resetting my battery – here is an oldie (and I hope goodie) on energy management.

Dam, Fork n’ Spoons – Managing the Autistic Energy Supply